'Retracing the roots' was started a long back than somebody would think it is. In fact it was either un-documented or sometimes written-but-not-published. I was madly in search for finding out the perfect co-ordination of mind and body so that over a period of time I structure to be a compact piece of human being .I landed to a career where people at last turn out to creatures who do over-thinking and less living and that worried me.what is the use of becoming a bulky, plumy and intelligent person?I felt like I was captured by a group of people who possess good brains, good money but with unresolved life-problems. Some of them finds it difficult even to bend for picking up a fallen pen!!. I want to preserve all that I could do with my body when I was a boy- I want to hide myself under a cot, I want to climb up on the trees ,I want to run fast,I want to eat anything that I want..and all.These thoughts became my preoccupation for being embarked on to Kalarippayattu arena.Then it became rather an obsession than interest.
Well, after telling all this to my roomies(they were 5 brilliant engineers), their face froze in an expression of incredulity for a second or two before they burst out laughing: -) . For some days it became as a cliché for my room-mates and none of them accompanied me to ISMA. They even thought that I am crazy and my interest won’t last long. One guy who knows me for a long time commented that his friend was intractable . Rather he confided to me about my rampant idealism of juggling roles between profession and tradition. Later this big time movie buff amazed me by marrying his colleague-guessing now why he couldn't find time those days. Everybody has a reason to do what they do/they do not do.
At kalari (the practice ground of kalarippyattu) where views melt and learning started, I came to realization that I was amidst the people that I always wanted to be with.Balakrishnan Nair was a great guru not only to martial arts but he could spiritually throttle a disciple’s mind. Under his training I not only experienced the feeling of being good physique but I found my-self illuminating the neural-roots(believe me I could feel it!!) so that my thoughts ultimately became n-times faster and clearer .Of-course speed of mind is complimentary to step out meythari(bare-hand-fight). Only he can perform the 'chuvadukal'(leg movements) who is clear in concepts.Once the neurons are cleansed ,you feel the gap between your mind and your body is filled,hence you do what you wanted to do with your body. When the days passed I started realizing thoughts of my pre-generations also. Just imagine, your brain is inherited from your father /mother ,so the thoughts they ensemble when they were young might be residing in your brain. You can argue with me that thoughts are not something which 'exist or sediment' just like that. But can I ask you what is matter-energy relationship proposed by Einstein. Seeing ‘thoughts’ as an energy pattern, they can be converted to matter. A group of such matters combined will become 'genes'. Everybody knows that the gene can pass behaviors(behavior-pattern is the result of what you ‘think’ in a particular real-life scenario) Well that is what my understanding & explanation of how I got plugged into my forefather's thoughts.Though I am not a biologist I am clear about what happens inside me.
Those were the days of hard-core practice which exhausted me to such a level that,I used to glut two mugs of fresh-juice to reinstate. The inexplicable experience of being reincarnated.
'Experts don’t advertise themselves’ and that is what I have to say about Guru Balachandran master at Dharmikam(kalari-ashram). I was fortunate enough to start by giving Dakshina to Guru’s guru. And way back in bangalore I deeply regret of the exotic life that I have lost.Retracing those roots I see a large turn that I have taken. Don’t know whether I shall be able to cross-back that turn at some point of time in future. But I wish I could.
Being the owner of a bike which was accessible to anyone anytime, I could nurture good friendship with the seniors. They taught me ,cared me like a younger brother .I was one among them. With a tint of sadness I bid them adieu… -Season In the sun from Westlife -hearing those lines reminds me of them.
"good bye to you my trusted friend....Together we climbed hills n' trees...I was the black sheep of the family....We had joy ,we had fun we had season in the sun but the hills that we climbed were just seasons out of time"